What do you do on days when there is no air??

Today has been one of those days where it feels like there is no air. You are left gasping for breath just moving a few meters and even sitting still feels like you are trying to breathe through a pillow. It is horrible and unrelenting. Not only is there no air and very humid the pollen count is through the roof, pollution is high- just about everything thrown in that an asthmatic does not want to see in the weather report.

I feel like I have clock watched all day willing the hours to go by until it is night and there might be some relief as the sun goes down.

But what do you do on days like this?? What can you do to take your mind off the effort that breathing brings when even eating and drinking is an effort.

Today I have just made sure I have everything within my reach, nebulisers, tv remote, phone, water. Trying to limit the activity and not making any movements that can be avoided. It is tough as you always think you have everything to hadn’t and then you don’t.

I have been lucky today that I can watch the lacrosse European Championships as it is being streamed live which has passed the time very well. I have found I have been dozing on and off too. I am still so grateful that I have my electric bed so I can prop myself up, and relax easing my chest sightly. I am also super fortunate to have a Dyson Cool Air Fan with filter which has been life saving today and on previous warm days. I have had it on pretty much permanently when I am in as it does offer a lot of relief and is not just blowing warm air around. It is actually cold air it blows out!!

When the weather is this hot and muggy I find eating a huge difficulty. I have no appetite and anything substantial that I do eat I find myself feeling like I am choking as I just can’t breathe properly. This is not isolated to when the weather is like it is but also when I am unwell with a chest infection or in hospital post acute exacerbation. I have found my solution to this though!!!

Strawberry Yazoo is my go to drink. Whenever I am not great this is what I like to have. It has all the pick me ups you need but also does provide you with some nutritional benefits too- although you should not use them as a meal replacement I do find that when my breathing is bad these are the best things. I also always have a fridge and freezer full of fruit pre cut or ave berries etc so I have eat them easily and they are not too bulky, the freezer always also has ice pops, ice cream, ice lollies because you just need them to cool down but also nebulising a lot dries my mouth out and makes everything feel funny so the coldness is really nice on my mouth too.

A lot of people have been messaging me today with their tips and tricks for the hot weather. These include:

  • Bowl of ice in front of a fan
  • cold showers or bath
  • driving in the car with the air con on
  • a cold towel on the back of your neck

Others have also suggested going to hospital but I just think that would be as bad except they could give me IV mediation to make my lungs happier but it will still be airless and really hot in the wards- in fact probably even hotter than it is in my flat and then you add in lying on a plastic mattress. I think I will stay put unless things do get very difficult and I am getting close to my limit of what I am allowed to do at home. One friend did say hospital wouldn’t be that bad because ICU has air con!!! I would hope that I would not need ICU (even if air con seems like a nice idea)!

Any other ideas people have for staying cool and making the lungs feel a bit happier please share!!

Taking time helps to heal

The first week of annual leave I really felt a little bit of a mess and just didnt know what to do with myself and everything seemed really negative and falling apart around me, but a week in and half way through my annual leave I feel things are starting to get back together and I feel much better for it.

I have had time this week to sit, think and evaluate what it important, what I should prioritise and what I shouldn’t but also to look at what is important to me both in terms of what I like and want to do but also in terms of what is going to keep me healthy and well.

I didnt go to the World Cup to volunteer and to say I was down in the dumps about it would be an under statement. I didnt think I would feel as down about it as I did. It shocked me just how much it effected me but its been for the good. I have been able to watch all the games live over a web stream which if i sit back and think about it I wouldn’t have got to watch all the games if I was there volunteering as would be working and doing stats rather than watching the lacrosse for sheer enjoyment and trying to work out plays and watch how decisions are made and coaches change their tactics according to how games are progressing has been great fun so there are positives of not being there.

I also got a lovely message from the Scotland team today as well thanking me for what I have done which brought a wee tear to my eye. That team are a really special one and each member I really value and glad to be part of their prep to the World Cup so I hope each and everyone of them is enjoying the experience.

This next week I am going to London on Sunday and doing a talk along with some other bits and pieces then coming back home again.

I will be able to spend the rest of my time up north at the cottage for a few days working on various bits of research I am doing and have a new role as part of a patient advisory group for the European Lung Foundation too which is exciting. I am already a patient advisor for a study they are leading but really looking forward to something different with this role.

I thought the 2 weeks were really going to drag as I wasn’t doing what I had planned a while ago and I sort of put it to the back of my mind my annual leave as I knew thinking about it would also bring about thoughts of what I should have been doing but wasn’t able to but I have had so much support from friends that the week flew by and I am sure the next one will to and I will be moaning about wanting to be back on annual leave rather than working!

I need to do some resting as chest wise its been a wee struggle this last week more so than has been for a while but I think thats because the weather has been quite muggy and humid never an asthmatics friend! So hopefully the rain that is pelting down just now will clear the air to make for happy lungs and happy breathing!!!!

Some nights you just want to cry

Tonight is one of those nights where I am super tired but I just want to cry or scream and really don’t know what to do with myself.

The air feels thick and I have this overwhelming feeling to stick my head in a cold shower or go outside, although going outside will not do anything as it is the change in weather that is causing me to feel like this. The weather is getting warmer but with that there are subtle changes in atmospheric pressure causing my asthma to play up a little bit. It is a choking feeling and a heaviness in the air making it feel like I need to gulp it down to get it into my lungs. To try and alleviate these symptoms I have my fan going to circulate the air and have taken an extra boost of prednisilone to help settle things. But as always taking extra prednisilone at night results in a very broken night with little to no sleep. Better no sleep than no breath though.

There was no point to this post but  just a need to vent and put down the feelings in a hope I may catch a few hours kip before work tomorrow!